Perfection

"I know that I'm not perfect

but I keep trying

because that's what I said I would do from the start

I'm not alive if I'm lonely

so please don't leave

is it something I said or just my personality"

Perfect by Hedley

We all realize that perfection is impossible. So why even have a word to describe something that isn't even real. It's not like I could tell you what perfection really even is. Your idea of perfection and mine are completely different, or maybe they are quite similar. So why do I want to talk about perfection? Because it controls my life.

Here's how:

• I have become this person who is quiet, and one of the reasons is because I want to be able to say something that is going to make a difference. I want to say all the right, perfect, things.
• I have a bit of an unhealthy view of the way I look. Who doesn't want to look "perfect". So I kill myself sometimes, push myself past limits that I shouldn't, and think things about myself that I hope no one else thinks. Yet after all of that I'm still the same old me, kind of. I'm never going to look perfect. I'm short for someone's-sake, that's already a huge disadvantage to being perfect.
• My personality is made up of all the things I feel people think are healthy to be. It makes me quite boring, and I fade easily in the background. I'm seriously just another face in a crowd.
• My mind constantly is thinking about what I say, think, or do and trying to turn those things into perfection. I fail miserably.

Don't try to be perfect, it is the biggest waste of your life. Not that I know what our lives should be spent on but just don't spend it on that. It will never make you happy, it makes everything worse. I can't say anything without hoping someone didn't take it the wrong way. I look into the mirror and wish to be someone else. It's unnatural and unhealthy. It used to be worse, I'm a little less harsh on myself but I need to cut it out completely. I'm really not so bad, I guess. haha.